Sunday 16 March, 2008

Chemical Analysis of a MBA Student

Tired of the ubiquitous SWOT analysis, PEST analysis, WACC method and Cash Flow calculation, which still makes me scratch my head thinking how does it help one in taking strategic decisions with 6 minds taking 7 decisions based on the analysis, I come back to something which is more substance-ful and something which any Chemical Engineer is good at.. Chemical Analysis.. This article is meant to dissect a MBAs Chemical Analysis..

Symbol: St

Atomic Weight: Incomprehensible, uncertain

Occurrence:

  • In canteen with Laptops open (and Packman being played)
  • In cinema theatres (Matinee shows, resultant after a process called bunking)
  • In coffee houses discussing the plummeting stock market
  • And rarely in classes.

Allotropic Forms:

Found in two allotropic forms males & females. A few rare species with a good overlap between the two are also sometimes encountered.

Free State:

Seen in the library, the Chai stall outside college and occasionally in class room.

Combined State:

Found in couples who are oppositely charged and very temporary. Some in transition are found wagging their tongues at the view opposite to the college.

Physical Properties:

  • A MBA student is a smart mix, carries Dell Laptop and blesses the library with a prolonged presence till late nights (only in the case of endangered species called bookworms)
  • Good conductor of latest fashion
  • A bad conductor of studies or advice
  • Boils at insult point, melts at flattery especially from oppositely charged species (temperature vary from individual to individual)
  • Good conductor of gossip, gyaan and criticizing the IT industry
  • Occasionally found well dressed with blazers on

Chemical Properties:

  • Great affinity for case studies, Sutta song and presenting PPTs
  • Reaction to water: Insoluble, usually bathes once a week.
  • Repulsed by textbooks, especially reference materials.
  • Neutral to advice
  • Reacts with studies under high pressure and temperature
  • Found with a high usage density of words like leverage, brand equity, hedging and product mix.

Purification Techniques:

Can be purified by complex process called exams (Surprise tests in particular) after vigorous shaking to awaken from constant hibernation.


7 comments:

entropicbeauty said...

awesum post..so very identifiabe and true 2 life.. :-)

Anonymous said...

Good work dude! Awesome reading! :D

Parts I REALLY liked:

"Good conductor of gossip, gyaan and criticizing the IT industry. Occasionally found well dressed with blazers on."

"Great affinity for case studies, Sutta song and presenting PPTs"

"Repulsed by textbooks, especially reference materials. Neutral to advice."

"Found with a high usage density of words like leverage, brand equity, hedging and product mix."

"vigorous shaking to awaken from constant hibernation."

LOL Maddy... brilliant!!! :D

SiD said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
SiD said...

Masttt POst!!
Your subtle humour at work again...

Gives 'GOOD INSIGHTS' into the life of a MBA.. ;)

* those quoted words btw is the fav phrase of our marketing teacher: one we really love - the quote that is!!

Jatin L said...

Meticulous Observations. I liked it.

Mahadevan said...

@ Jatin.. Thanks.. First time visitor to my blog?

Anonymous said...

Good post.