The Chomical Engineer - Redefined !!! (The Chomical Engineer - Part II)

"My name is Nadirshaw Dhondy. It is spelt as D-H-O-N-D-Y.. Its Y at the end and not I.. and dont ask me WHY" declared the Law Lecturer. A parsi who according to him is im-parsi-al (or impartial huh). A series of such lectures at MBA also makes Chomical Engineers like me im-parsi-al towards every subject that we study. Be it Accounting, Economics, Human Resources, Law or even Marketing. The fuzzy nature of every subject reinforces my chomical nature in academics. At least thats the way i perceive it to be.

Chomical Engineers find it difficult to grasp fundamentals of various subjects while doing their MBAs. Though there are many subjects of similar nature viz Financial Accounting, Cost Accounting, students like me end up scratching their heads figuring difference between the two. A group of highly active students (more active than a U238) grilling the lecturers often make me look at them with awe. Infact every word and jargon used by them made me feel as if they spoke mandarin and latin. Matters got worse when i was once alloted a humonguous task of teachig Cash Flow to the class as a part of assignment. Being a Chemical Engineer, Mass Flow, Energy Flow and Momentum Flows are the only flows i was conversant with. What was a Chemical Engineer (or a Comical Engineer) expected to teach in Cash Flow. Somehow as the golden rule says "If you cannot convince someone.. Confuse them." I had been wondering what progress I had made in 5 months as a b school student. Once the presentation was over i realised that after months of making me feel a moron, the place had finally made it possible for me to make other people feel a moron. What a progress...

The only subject I liked studying was Economics. It was closely linked to Thermodynamics (Yet another Chemical Engineering subject..). Both were full of graphs, both required a good proactive understanding, both were theorotically daunting and i was absolutely hopelessly bad at both. Yet i liked it because of one reason, no one was good at it. so you see for once i was at par with the class..hehe..

Subjects like Marketing is everyones favourite. I believe one can never be wrong and every word spoken in this lecture turns out to be a golden rule. Every strategy of a successful firm seems correct and all decisions of a failed company makes us feel how they lacked basic common sense. This actually reminds me of one of my classmates Mr. Champu, who has a common answer to every question and that is "Depends..".. "Will the strategy of umbrella marketing succeed in P&G." .. Champu will answer confidently "Depends.." (with a proud smirk on his face as if he has successfully replicated a DNA molecule..).. "Did Nestle take a correct decision in launching X product..".. again comes the answer "Depends..".. huh.. Such incidents reinforces my feeling that i m a perfect marketing material..

MBA also offers a myraid of subjects with excellent 'soporfic point'. This constant is similar to yet another chemical engineering term 'pour point' or 'flash point'. A soporfic point of 1 indicates its impossible to keep the iris and retina active in those lectures. And subjects like Economics and Statistics would definitely have a soporfic value of 10 or more. I am one of the priveldged few who end up dozing in class often and once i entered an elite class of sluggards of my batch when i achieved the feat of dozing off in 3 consequtive lectures. For once, i had a hat-trick.. yipee..

6 months into MBA and the definition of the chomical engineer is still is nt complete. Each passing day the I become more chomical. A chemical engineering graduate, worked in an IT firm, designed systems for an aerospace giant, pursuing MBA and placed in a reputed FMCG manufacturing firm in a marketing project.. Can anyone be a more Chomical Engineer???